Essay/Term paper: The untold story of theseus

Essay, term paper, research paper:  English

The Untold Story of Theseus


The road ran along the edge of the cliff above the burning blue sea. Theseus turned a bend in the road and saw a man sitting on a rock. The man held a great battle-ax in his hand; he was so large that the ax seemed like a hatchet.
Before the enormous man could say a thing, a thunderous voice shook the cliffs. The projected voice was heard to say, "Bumble Bee Tuna, Look to la Luna." Suddenly, Theseus disappeared in a flash of blue light.
This is all I can tell you for I know no more. You shall have to ask the spirit of Theseus to continue…

The Traveling
(The spirit of Theseus Speaks)
"I found myself in a dark place void of any light. I spent very little time in this manner. The dark place was soon illuminated by two men with fire sticks, that gave white light in stead of yellow."
"These men that shone their fire sticks at me were dressed strangely; all in blue. They spoke in an unfamiliar tong and shoved myself into what I could only describe at the time as a horseless chariot."
"After many days there slow minds concluded that I was a stranger in this land, and sent me to this house with many other young men my age."



(Timé Pasá)

"Many moons have passed. Over this time I was taught their language and concepts. I found that they call themselves Americans, more specifically "Michiganders". I have always been quick to learn and they labeled me as an adequate student. Me. Theseus. Son of Poseidon. Labeled as adequate? Sheeeshh. Anyway, I was told that tomorrow I would be going to a "High School", specificly, Nth grade."

High School

"High school was all fun and games until 6th hour. This class, called EXPLORE or some other silly word like that, was tought by an English teacher called by Mrs. Grumpp. Mrs. Grumpp had the honor of being named the most evil teacher in East Bloomfield. She was a short stocky woman, with pale gray hair, and a face like a prune. :-{ Always with her was an evil spyglass, which allowed her to see every weakness of her enemy, the students. This spyglass could not work on me, for I am the son of a god."
"Since she could not find, for me, any weakness, she relented to assinging many hours of grueling homestudy every night. This continued untill the time when many classmates gave up and failed to turn in any work at all."
"I could see that my classmates were suffering from this work, so I devised a plan. I told all my classmates to do all the work assinged and in the greatest length possible. I told them also to spare even the use of any contractions to shorten it."
"My classmates and myself continued to do all the work assinged for a few days. Till one day, Mrs. Grumpp was not in school. It was saidthat we gave her so much work to grade, she had a nervous breakdown. After the breakdown, she went to live in seclusion at her son"s old shack in the wilderness of Montana."
"After news of this spread, I was later greated by a tall, blond young man, much like myself. His voice sounded strangly familiar. After conversing for some time, I reconised his voice. It was the same voice I heard on the road to athens. He confirmed this, thanked me for my health and told me I must be on my way, for I had many other beasts to slay. And with the words, "Bumble Bee Beano, Chilé Riano", I was placed back on the road to Athens, right before the beastly man Sciron."

"If you wish to know more, you must ask the bad that called me here. For I grow tired and must return to my eternal rest."

(The Spirit of Theseus Fades)

Ahhh. So, did you enjoy the story? I hope you can tell it to me sometime for i seam to have nodded off somwhere. Ohh well, back to the story.

"Stop!" said the man.
"Good day," said Theseus.
"Now listen, stranger, everyone who passes this way........